The Hunger Games

We seem to be playing our own version of The Hunger Games down here.  But, you know, with hunger, not child warfare . . .

But before I explain our version of the Games, let me make a couple of things explicitly clear: There is absolutely nothing - NOTHING - wrong with giving your child formula.  Society puts too much pressure on women to do and be everything.  It's not enough to be a mother anymore.  You have to be a working mother.  And one who works out and keeps her body perfectly toned (at least down South).  And you have to give birth naturally.  And you have to nurse your baby (even though you are working full time - somehow, you need to figure out how to nurse your baby too).  It's not fair.  And "it's not fair" is one of my very least favorite statements ever (second only to "I'm bored").  But this really is unfair to women.  It's impossible to be and have it all.  We all have to make choices in life, mothers in particular.  And if you want to feed your child formula and/or think that's best for your child, that's your own damn business and people ought to leave you alone.  On the flipside, if you want to nurse your children, people ought to leave you alone about that also (e.g., when you do it in public, as is often necessary unless you want to become a hermit). 

Ultimately, I decided that I wanted to take a break from work and nurse my boys.  I wanted to nurse for two main reasons.  First, I trust nature more than I trust multinational corporations.  For the most part, I like eating "real" food - real butter/cream/sugar - not chemical substitutes.  I don't trust packaged foods because I often can't discern whether the contents are made with genetically-modified seeds/grains (if you can decipher those labels, you are a better man/woman than me).  Needless to say, I trust the milk my body makes more than I trust a powdered substitute that Nestle makes (especially when Nestle does evil, evil things like giving free formula samples to mothers in Africa only to turn around and force them to pay for formula once their own milk supply has dried up and they can't feed their babies (or, as you probably guessed, afford to buy formula), but I digress . . . ).  I don't believe that anyone can improve upon the milk that my body already produces and I happen to think it's the best thing for my boys.  That isn't to say that formula isn't good also - it clearly is!!  And it offers women much more flexibility than nursing does.  I just don't buy that formula is "better" than breast milk.  Second, and much more selfishly, I wanted the baby weight off of me as quickly as possible after the boys were born and everyone told me breastfeeding was the quickest way to get it off (which I can now confirm is true).  Having made the decision to nurse my children, I personally was going to be quite upset if I had to resort to formula.  But we almost came to formula last week with Deuce. 

Poor Deuce, who seemed so much better once I stopped eating dairy and red meat, regressed a bit and I had to take him back to the doctor.  She told me I "had to" put him on formula because he clearly had a food allergy/sensitivity to something (other than dairy) that I was eating.  I proceeded to go home and cry when I nursed him for what I thought was the last time (and that's saying something - I've only cried one other time since the boys arrived - when I thought Tait was hurt (he wasn't)).  I tried to give Deuce formula for 12 hours before I decided an elimination diet and breast feeding was the better option (basically, he screamed bloody murder for 12 straight hours and refused to take more than an ounce of the formula - that boy is nothing if not 100% certain of what he likes . . . )

The elimination diet is awful.  No dairy, no soy, no wheat, no nuts, no fish, no eggs, and no corn for me.  For all practical purposes, that leaves me with veggies, fruits, and chicken/turkey.  My diet mainly consisted of those things before, but the occasional carb (cracker, granola bar, piece of bread, yogurt, etc.) was appreciated.  I am STARVING trying to keep up with the calorie expenditure of feeding twins while eating nothing but fruits and vegetables.  At this rate, I'll fit back in my wedding dress next week.  Gross.  Also difficult is that I basically can't exercise while I'm on this diet.  I miss running and definitely thought I'd be back at it right now.  But I can't risk burning any more calories than I already am - I'm too afraid my milk supply will decrease.  So, for now, I do sit ups, arm workouts, and two-mile walks with the dogs.  And I'm thinking about starting yoga also - I've always wanted to but never had time (or, frankly, the motivation - who cares about MORE working out when you are running 50 miles a week?).

On the other hand, having been on the diet for more than a week now, Deuce is doing so much better.  Though the days are still sometimes hit or miss (with some days being much better than others), Deuce is eating more than he's eaten since he was a month old, he isn't screaming all day long, he's gaining weight, and he isn't pooing CONSTANTLY.  Those are the only things keeping me on this heinous diet.  And I've made Scott (and Deuce!) promise to take me out for cheeseburgers and milkshakes once this is all over.  Deuce hit his weight goal (11 lbs, 8 ounces) this past Friday (we weigh-in every Friday to make sure he is going to have doubled his weight by his four-month birthday).  That despite basically not eating for a full day when I tried to force formula down his throat.  Keep your fingers crossed for this Friday - he needs to be at 11 lbs, 13 oz.  We've got appointments with a GI specialist and allergist coming up to try and lock down the precise problem.  I, for one, am hoping the allergist tells me I can start eating SOMETHING other than fruits/veggies.  Eggs and nuts would be nice (they are in EVERYTHING), but that's probably wishful thinking. 

In other news, the boys have now found their feet and grab them all the time.  And their favorite thing to do is to stare at each other and smile.  Too, too cute!!  I hope they will be great friends!

'Til next time . . .

Three Months!

The boys were three months old on October 12.  How has it already been three months???  They don't have a doctor appointment this month.  That means no shots (yay!) but no "official" weigh-in either.  Not to be deterred (we wouldn't want me to go a whole month without freaking out over the boys' growth . . .), I weighed the boys myself.  Tait weighed in at 12 lbs, 10.5 oz.  He's got to be the biggest three month old ever.  He's already more than doubled his birth weight.  Deuce weighed 11 lbs, 3.5 oz.  I am trying not to freak out about his small size.  According to the internet (which I should REALLY stop searching if I value my sanity at all), babies are supposed to double their birth weight by 4 months.  That means Deuce needs to hit 12 lbs, 6 oz by November 12.  He's on target, but just barely.  Keep your fingers crossed for my little guy - he just doesn't seem to care too much about eating (which makes me wonder if he's really mine . . . I eat CONSTANTLY).

In other three month news, both boys have really picked up their playing - they kick and reach when I put them down on their playmat.  Too cute!  And they are both smiling up a storm (even Deuce!).  Love it!

Here are some recent pictures:

Tait:

Deuce:

Milk comas (and a snoozing Matty in the background):

Comparison of them in nap nanny as newborns vs. three months:

"Cuddling:"

One of Tait frowning ('cause Lord knows I've posted enough of Deuce frowning . . .):

Recognition.

Big week around here - Tait noticed his brother for the very first time!  When he did, he smiled at him (and totally melted my heart in the process - when did I become such a sap??).  Hopefully Deuce will return Tait's stare soon.  Here are some recent pictures.  Enjoy!

 

 

 

The not-so-angy Irishman

In a previous post, I mentioned that poor Deuce had been sick, sick, sick.  Here's the full story:

At the boys' two-month appointment, Deuce was really fussy - screaming, fists clenched, the whole bit.  I informed his doctor that that was pretty much par for the course for Deuce.  She said it wasn't normal.  She also said it wasn't normal for him to have fallen from the 40th percentile height/weight to the 5/10th percentile height/weight.  And it wasn't normal that he had greenish poo (sorry - TMI).  So she did a test and found that the poor kid had microscopic amounts of blood in his stool (thereby explaining the green hue . . . ) and diagnosed him as having a dairy allergy.  To make a long story short, I was eating (a lot!) of dairy; Deuce is allergic to dairy; and my milk was therefore tearing his stomach up and flying through him so quickly that he wasn't gaining weight appropriately.  Fortunately, there was an easy fix - I just had to stop eating dairy (and all other cow protein - i.e., red meat).

Within three days of my quitting dairy, Deuce was a different kid.  He wasn't screaming anymore!  Turns out my angry little Irishman isn't so angry after all!  I thought Deuce was just an intense little guy; instead, he was screaming because he was in pain.  In addition to his new, mellow(ish) personality, he is eating like a crazy person and growing normally again.  He was 11 pounds as of yesterday - so he's officially putting on an ounce or so a day (which is what he was supposed to be doing all along).  Hurray!  Maybe he won't have to be a jockey after all?!?

The only downside is that I can't eat dairy anymore and I desperately miss cheese and yogurt.  And being able to go out to dinner w/o demanding that the chef not cook any part of my meal in butter (making me the most annoying customer in the entire restaurant . . .).  And, as it turns out, there is dairy in a lot more foods than you'd think (virtually all edible protein bars, etc.).  But it's worth it to have a happy Deucy!  And, for what it's worth, I'm now officially below my pre-pregnancy weight - so that's another perk I guess. 

Here are some pictures of our not-so-angry, dairy-free Irishman (and one to prove that he can still freak out when he wants to . . . ):